Kardashia Stories part 1

 One of the oddest Kardashian legends is that they were the only country in the world to have been invaded both by the Swedes and the Chinese. For a long time this was dismissed as a mere folk-tale, but recently dramatic new evidence has emerged suggesting that the story may well be true, for D.N.A. sampling amongst Kardashians has revealed both typical Swedish and Chinese genetic profiles.Kardashia is a small state with a chequered history. Its language is unique,and unintelligible to outsiders. The early history of its peoples is little known.  In early modern times it formed part of the Ottoman Empire, though the Sultan in Istambul rarely exercised much direct control there. It achieved independence in the late 19th century, when a more-than-usually obnoxious German prince was imposed as its monarch. In the Second World War it was occupied by the Nazis, and then disappeared behind the Iron Curtain. It has recently reasserted its independence of both East and West, though it is noticeable that the same government leaders appear to be in control as in the Communist days. The Swedish link must come from remnants of Charles XII's army fleeing southwards after their disastrous defeat by Peter the Great at Poltava in 1709. The source of the Chinese link is less obvious; one guess is that when Mongol forces pulled back from central Europe following the death of Ogdei Khan in 1242, certain Chinese units serving with the Mongol army decided to branch out on their own account.

(More episodes from Kardashian history will follow)

Emily

Emily sprinkled the chocolate shards on her breakfast cappuchino and wondered what picture the random blotches would conjure up in her mind today. But she had no time to waste daydreaming, so she took a quick snap of it with her mobile and then slurped it down before hurrying off to work. Later on, she could observe it at leisure, or even discuss it with her friends to see what they made of it.

Sometimes it was a fish, and once it was a rodeo rider whirling a lariat, but most often it was a dog. Emily loved dogs. Yes, this one was a dog: a short-legged, flop-eared little mutt, standing on its hind legs and looking straight at her. A dachshund or terrier of some kind; how cute!

Examining the photo again before she went to bed, Emily noticed that the dog appeared to be wearing glasses, and carried a bag or basket in its left paw. So, a cartoon dog. Perhaps the pictures she’d seen on previous days had been cartoon creatures too. Now that was an idea: stories about cartoon animals and people that came to life on a cup of cappuchino! She could become a famous children’s author! Emily was confident that she might have the ability to do this, but doubted whether she would have the time or the energy. She enjoyed her job, which was an important and responsible one, and well remunerated, but it was very exhausting, and often she felt completely drained when she came home. This was one of those evenings. As she sat slumped in her chair, she wondered what was in the dog’s bag, and the answer came into her head, “Cocaine”. Now that would make it something very different, she mused: a cartoon for adults, dark and probably violent …..

In bed, waiting to go to sleep, she wondered; Why did cocaine suddenly occur to her then? Was it something to do with that colleague at work, a senior director, no less, whom they suspected of being a user? And didn’t he once hint to her that she might like to visit him and try some? But Emily didn’t want to go there, and she had avoided the issue by pretending that she hadn’t understood the hint.

She was still picturing the little dog with the mysterious basket when she fell asleep.